Sleep Talking

Shane talks in his sleep.  Like,  a lot.

The first time, that I remember, he was 2.  We were staying at a lakeside cabin and he was sleeping in our room with us (it was a really small cabin).  As we were getting ready for bed, I was looking at Shane, so peaceful and snuggly in the huge bed.  Out of nowhere he sat up, smiled and said "CHEESE!"

(He also had a bout of night terrors that lasted about 10 years, but this is about what he says when he's sleeping.)

Now he's 12.  And he talks but it's a little racier, language-wise.  Most of the time we can't understand what he says (hence the "mumble" below), but three talks are in the bank and are, really, just awesome.  And hilarious.  Especially the last one (just wait!).  Here they are, in a random order since I can only remember when the last one happened since it was just last week:

Number 3 - After dinner with friends who have a very energetic puppy.  "Mumble mumble mumble fucking dog mumble mumble"

Um, hello?  Where did we learn words like that?

Number 2 - In Orlando for the weekend, all 4 of us in the same room.  "Mumble mumble" and then he yelled "shut the fuck up!" and more mumbling.

There's that word again.  Fortunately I've only heard it twice.  I know it's not a nice word, and really I don't like to swear in public, but without the F word, it's not the same.  Please be assured you won't be reading the F word anymore, unless I write more later about what he says in his sleep.

Number 1 - this just happened last week.  Shane wandered into our room in the middle of the night and climbed in bed with us.  "Mumble mumble leave me alone mumble." A little later, "mumble I KNOW" kind of loud, followed by "well what about this" and then, and I swear I am not making this up, he farted.  For real.  A real, live, fart followed immediately after "well what about this."

I am still laughing about that one.

Andrew doesn't talk in his sleep.  He snores.

I love my boys so much, and I love that they have no idea I have a blog.